The Concept Of God

Theists and Atheists, the ontologically sound and the hollow, the epistemologically inclined and the abstinent, lend me your ears, listen to what i have to say on this one. I don't want to hurt your opinions, i don't want to change your perceptions. All i want, is to present this discussion in new light, a sumptuous food for thought, if you'd like to put it after reading this one.

The theists and the Atheists have had sempiternal debates over this, and bet me, the debates have led to nothing concrete. In the end both people from both parties go back to where the were. Believers stay believers, non believers stay non-believers. Debates over such topics are a waste. It is because the believers present the the notion of God as nothing short of a reckless magic, wherein by virtue of being God, some supreme being is hailed the creator, perpetuator and the destroyer of this Universe. 

Being a believer is easy. The whole of the Universe with its infinite artistic beauty on the outside strutted with the rationalist mathematics and science on the inside makes human beings wonder whether there is a supreme power that has bestowed us with this enigmatic Life and all the surroundings. Failing to find answers of which, instills their faith in a power supreme. What adds to their belief are the mere coincidences which are given the name of mystical realism. In this world of mad believers and foolish pawns, God is the shortest escape from reality into a world of fairies and fairy tales.

Being a non-believer is easy too. When the die hard followers of science and logic step into the arena armed with their reasoning ability and argue that what cannot be seen or felt is non-existent, it puts the believers in a trap they can't get out of. But, when asked to comment on the magnitude of the construction of this Universe with its myriad manifestations in the form of diversity in all the living and the non living things, they tend to shy away and blame it all on chance events and randomness. It may be a good leeway, but then again it leads to nothing of much use and moreover helps in hiding the meaning of life and the purpose of creation in deeper darker and dangerous dungeons.

Who am i? Am i an Atheist?
No. 
Am i a believer? 
Read On.
What i have, is, faith in the concept of God. God for me, is not the creator or the destroyer of life in this Universe, but he is the manifestation of my faith, the faith that keeps me going. Having faith is the only thing that makes any person want to live this life, the purpose of which is otherwise indeterminate. To me, the whole point of life is figuring what life is all about. Now faith manifests itself in a huge number of ways. Some people have faith that they'll end up being filthy rich and enjoy all the pleasures of life, while others have faith that they'll live happy lives by sticking to only the bare necessities and no more. Some people have faith that they will help the needy in the society and change their lives and make the planet a better place for them to live while others have faith that they'll change the world as we see it through groundbreaking research in the domains of the Science and Mathematics. To me God is the piggy(Faith) bank where in i can put all my faith coins in, and pull them out when i need them, and i have no shame in admitting it. When i go about doing a task and i know at the back of my mind that something powerful is taking good care of me, chances are, i'd give it my best shot, almost always. If it turns out to be a success, i thank him, i implant more faith in my Faith bank, and drop in fresh coins. If it doesn't turn out to be a success, i thank him for the experiences gained. God is that piece of code, that keeps running in the kernel of my body, or the mind, that keeps me motivated in my endeavors, consoles me when the chips are down, pats me on the back when i do something good. In short God is the mentor that i always wanted. Its easy to blame him when things don't go my way, but then, mentors too, are allowed to make mistakes. Its important not to hand him the string of your life, but let him be the Krishna that guides the Arjun, the Arjun being you in this case. He does not have answers to all the questions, but he strengthens the gut instincts that lead to to wisdom. Talking to him is nothing more than just taking out time for yourself and we all have realized how important that is. 

God to me is as living as anything in this world, only that he is omnipotent because he resides in my mind and i can talk to him whenever and wherever i feel like. He is not the person that is running this Universe, which we are a part of, but He is as much a part of this as any living being. And with all the grandeur and the might we are witness to, at all times and at all places, i have reason to believe that there is more to my Faith bank than just a store house of my Faith coins. And that is about it, i have said a lot, but a lot more is hidden between the lines of this text and still a lot more can be said, but i'll not spill out everything for you. 

I have just presented one manifestation of God as my Faith bank, the way you would like it to be is your call. Call him power supreme, call him the creator, call him God, call him luck, call him by any name; for me he makes life, a hell lot simpler. Thanks for your time, Ciao! :)

Gosh, Why Do I Leave The Title For The End

No Dude! Please Dude!

Listen Me Out, Wont you?

Wont you be my virtual friend. Wont you want to know whats happened to me?

Wont you want to know why i am not online these days and why i am just so indifferent.

Okay, to cut things short, i'm just not doing good. Its not about work and intern and new city and the weather. Its just the first time i have felt a nostalgia so overpowering that every time i listen to "Coming Back To Life", not only does every plucked string send a shiver down my spine, but it also eventually lands me up in tears. By the way you have to hide your face every time you cry in office. But then its not that it is unmanageable or something.

You know my eyes are so heavy now, just after a fresh dose of the same song i mentioned above, i can barely write but i have to because i need to. Its been that kind of a week. I guess it all started after i decided to just read through the very old scraps on orkut. Its just that refreshing smell of the friendship i got which has changed into that stale air in a matter of 3 years. I used to talk to so many friends at that time which i do no more and i just don't know how to put it words i feel when i go through those scraps. Its like how hugely we all have changed in just 3 years. Turned into more stupid, less intelligent, ironically more responsible and mature human beings. All this time i kept bragging how i have never changed and how i never want to change but as a matter of fact, i have and it hurts when i introspect, but time does that to everyone, this i have realized and accepted. I have never felt so lonely in life. In BITS whenever i used to feel this way i had some one or the other in whom i confided in, but there is no-one here. I am just a wanderer on my own, talking on the phone doesn't help and neither do Gtalk chats. I just so want to vent out my feelings but they keep piling up. I miss the times in college. Just miss the first year ki masti, just miss the DudePana of the second year, miss the Rape of the 3rd year. Miss school, miss home, miss behen, miss Zappi, miss everyone. I just wish at least one of my really good friends was here right now. But time is the best healer, its the best doctor and the best surgeon. I hope it will do its job well. And Now that i'm already crying, i wont stop myself this time too, so guys bye. And i so miss all the good and the bad times.

Take Care.

ChUn_ChUn : Origins [ Etymology ] & Evolution

I shall take you back in time, 3 years to be precise. The Events that happened in Chronological order are listed as follows:
(i). Master Amit Gupta with family landed in SHITs Pi*a*n* ( B*TS as we used to call it back then ) in the huge Chevrolet Tavera, in the night time and found accommodation in 173 RAM.
(ii). Parents went away the 3rd day and there we were, some 800 newly admitted students each ready to start a new chapter of ( his/her/whatever) life.
(iii). Registration done. Six subjects to be studied every semester as we got to know. Biology happened to be the subject which we had to study in the first semester itself.
Now see, there are four things you need to know. First RAM was a funny bhavan. Secondly Bio was a funny subject. Thirdly Amit was a funny guy. Lastly Mr. Ashish Runthala ( lets call him Arun in short ) was a funny teacher, and it was decided by heavens that he should teach Master Amit Gupta (a funny resident of a funny bhavan), a funny subject.
Bio never not ever was my no piece of no cake. To top that, Bio classes were scheduled to be held every alternate day early morning 8 o'clock (I’m talking about tutorial classes, lectures in all I attended two.)
Here I describe how I link all the funny things stated above. We used to study our asses off the night before every Bio tutorial. But hey, Arun was no n00b/BooB MEite and he knew his subject well. And with each passing tut, my marks kept dropping. No matter how hard I used to study I could manage at most 2 or 3 out of a maximum of 10. Hate for Arun all this while kept building up. Now I had a fascination for making funny names. The sheer repugnance I used to feel made me come up with a very apt name for him. Thus the first bricks of my Baptism had been laid. I'll not make you wait more and I take sheer pride in telling that I named Arun, simply …… wait…… for ….. It …. Chootiya Runthala ( I important thing I forgot to tell is that the word Chootiya is revered among the guys, because of the sheer amount of condescension with which it is blurted out and how beautifully it pierces the opponents body and impinges on his heart). Well, coming back, RAM was a funny bahvan and so were its inhabitants. With my constant blabbering of his awesome name every time the word Bio came up, my friends decided to call me Chunthala (short form of the prestigious name I gave Arun). Soon the funny inhabitants also capable of coming up with funny names decided that Chunthala had to be rechristened as ChunChun.
Thus was born a legend. A guy for whom I have respect in my mind. He has managed to make so many people laugh (or maybe cry sometimes), but all these years he has not changed one bit. Maybe from the outside, but from deep within I know that this guy has is the same as ever from the inside. We have been together for the last three years and I have seen him brave many a storm. Remarkably, each time, he came out stronger than ever, more mature and a more lovable person each time. The child who is deep within him gives him the strength to keep going on the same path, making people laugh by laughing at himself and that’s how he wants to spend his whole life. I think my bond will him will only get stronger with time and I can’t wait to find out what more he has in store for this world. So do you, don’t you?

The Division Bell

The ever so mesmerising piano from _Clocks_ fills my mind with reveries. Sweet memories of the times i've spent with my close friends in this desert. But there is a strange apprehension building up. Apprehension about parting from some of my best friends. Isn't it strange? Together, tethered to the this place for 3 years and on one fine day, it dawns upon you that half of your batchmates are gone ? Gone forever ?Gone for good, gone for bad? No one's going to be evaluating the answer to this question. To each his own. Only time will tell. But the fact that they'll be gone stays. I don't intend to make all my readers land up in tears, but just that all should keep an eye on the calender, the days when you start missing your chunchun draw near :)
Its been a really nice semester. Friends have been kind to me and i have been loyal to them. For starters i have cemented my bond with most of the people i had intended to. I knew this was my last chance. This place has given me something, and i'll not be leaving empty handed. Though not many but some really good friends indeed. This is my return gift and i am glad. Though i haven't been as lucky in academics. But i intend not to give up on life. There is so much more to explore and will sooner or later find my Love. No big deal. So many things happened this semester, starting from the trip to hills with haRAMis, 3 days i will never ever forget. The night of 25th January will henceforth be celebrated as Booze night every year and where ever you are ( u know if i'm taking bout u ) you shall drink to mark the love we have for each other remembering all the good times we've spent. Then the batch snaps, which i was so hesitant about initially. Batch snaps was the best thing to happen this semester. Then the 7 day trip with my sis to her and my place and yeah we've come so much closer sis and you know. Finally came the year book and again i was hesitant in giving/taking write-ups. But u know i like these u-turns so much. I like to take longer paths to the same destination not because i'm a loser, but because i like to explore each and every possibility before i finally decide upon something. All the write-ups have landed me in tears. Some reminded me of old times, some just showed how much people care for me. Every write-up is extremely valuable and will remain with me for the rest of my life. Thanks Nitya, Ghana, Gujju, Ghiya and Toffi :)
To those who were not able to write 'write-ups' fot their close friends, i request you to give testimonials on social networking websites to them. You will not understand the importance of a testimonial unless you get one from a close friend.Go give it a try.
This is by far the least time i've put in writing any post and i guess it shows. But then it had been too long and i wanted to blog about whatever was going through my mind. With Clocks playing for the n-th time in loop, i will take leave with just a passing thought.

The Days are drawing near;
And we won't be together anymore;
And I'll just say;
While the sun shines, make hay!

PS: That was pretty shitty i guess :P
But yeah 4 weeks left, enjoy each other's company while ur still together. Ciao. :)

Rational fears, Irrational behavior

The pressure was building. With peers bringing out new posts @ the rate of 111 per day, i felt i was begining to lose another race and hence immediate action was required and what results is another bullshit post for i can’t write sensible stuff at all.
So there are weak personalities on Earth i thought, only to find out that even weaker exist. They are not only weak personalities, they are simply pathetic people. WIth brains that don’t function and with hearts that can’t sense emotion. People who have a sense of humor so bad , you want to slap their face every time they try to crack you up. People who are so damn engorssed in thinking about themselves all day long, they don’t care about what others have to say. People who look into the mirror and take pride in what they see, when in fact they are mere condescending maggets who look more ugly than your barber’s crap ever did.
Yeah well, so one month of the penultimate semester has passed, though not in the blink of an eye. This time i have felt everyday, every hour go by very slowly. I have no fear of missing my friends here because frankly i did not make many. This sem everyone is busy with their studies because after all every one has a vision, a dream to fulfill. So people hardly care to buzz on Gtalk, they shy away from going to night canteens with you lest you might end up wasting one hour of their extremely important lives. I wish them luck, but luck is a bitch mind you. And then there are people who won’t come on gtalk at all. As long as it serves them good i wish them too all the success in their endeavors, keeping in mind that only very few actually succeed and i don’t see any such personalities around me.
I went to a trip to the hills a few days back. It was the best thing to happen in a very long time. I was close to nature, and i loved it. In the mountains with cold breeze blowing on your face, i realized what shit we humans have turned their lives into. But nevermind for everyone has different set of priorities and the same applies to me too.
Looking back down on my yester years i feel like crying sometimes. But then the same goes for most of you, am i right? Those were the years to relish. I used to e a pretty optimistic guy back then. That
time i did not study for a purpose, i studied for the sheer pleasure studying brought me. I don’t know what the problem is but i can’t seem to find any subjects anymore. The only reason i’m studying this sem is because i want to improve my CGPA, not knowing if it will even help me in any way or not. But yeah there is the constant nagging from my parents side and i dont want to let them down.
Yeah but there is one thing that keeps me interested this sem and that is all the beautiful girls we see around campus this sem. I don’t know where from they have suddenly appeared but its a pleasant surprise none the less. And yeah i wan’t to relish my penultimate semester, so i won’t disclose any of the things which hurt me or keep me sad. I can’t waste your precious time. I on the other hand am not out of time at all, i like to live and learn at my pace and these bullshit exams won’t bog me down, though it hurts when my efforts fail fruition. There are people who i’ll be seeing for the last time and it is my request that they don’t mind if i block them or remove them from my Gtalk list forever.

Finally you are requested not to post any nonsense comments. If you agree with me, then put forth anything that brings new light to the dark story. If you don’t agree then i request

you to keep your fingers off that keyboard.
” Earn you bread, Or thank heavens for what you have.”

My Chemical Romance

As you sit in your dormitory, with your computer as the only one to giving you company, you read the following conversation you just had:

x:

hiii

Amit:

well !
hi

x:

kya hua??

Amit:

nothing

x:

kya chal raha hai??

Amit:

kuch khaas nahi

Sent at 7:54 PM on Monday
Amit:

kya chal raha hai??

x:

songs sun rahi hoon

x:

ok

Sent at 7:58 PM on Monday
Amit:

kya hua kuch baat karne ko nahi ?

x:

arey kuch search kar rahi thi
tu bata kuch
kya kya kiya holz me??

x:

maasi k ghar gaya kuch din
aur baaki time ek dost k saath nikaal diya

x:

hmm
hmm
delhi me hi
??

Amit:

zyada dost nahi rh gaye hain
ab to contacts ban kar reh gaye hain vo
nahi maasi dehradoon mein th

x:

snowfall hui vahan??

Amit:

nahi

x:

kahin busy ho kya tum abhi??

Amit:

mai hheee
mai kabhi busy nahi hota yaar

x:

acha
hmmmm
i c

Amit:

mai apne aap ko chhodkar sabhi ko busy paata hoon
ye to maine bataya bhee hai

x:

arey
numb3rs dekha hai tumne?/

Amit:

nahi
kyu

x:

bohat sahi hai
dekh na

Amit:

nahi

x:

acha hai
sahi me

Amit:

i know
i just dont want to

x:

acha

Amit:

tune dekha hai kya
?

x:

tabhi to bol rahi hoon

Amit:

nahi matlab dekh rahi hai kya ?

x:

naa
abhi nahi dekh rahi
but dekha hai maine

Amit:

okay
there is a series on DC titled ’story of india’
watch that
and also ‘man vs wild’

You realize you never expected such a dull conversation with someone who you thought, was pretty close to you. You then buzz your sister and ask her for after dinner walk. She agrees. You move out of your room, not switching the lights off because you fear the dark. You meet her. You don’t greet her, but the eyes say it all for you. You walk through different areas of the campus. You see girls and boys together, in small groups and in big groups. You see some of the groups making noise, girls and boys alike, laughing loud. Sometimes you see the odd girl and boy holding hands, and giggling on certain occasions. As you pass them, you look into the girl’s eyes and you know from inside that it is not just a look that you give, its a probing stare but you let them pass without a saying a word. You don’t know them after all. Finally you accompany your sister to her hostel. You don’t say goodbye. You just turn back. Again your eyes saying what your mouth couldn’t.

You come back to your dormitory. You switch on the computer and listen to an ‘Emo’ band. You ponder over the fact that you are bginning to see more and more girls on campus and that too with guys. The only problem is that none of the girls you saw were from your batch. Thousands of reasons cross your mind as to why this happened. The one which you have the hardest time accepting but the one that easily explains everything is that you are just plain unlucky. But blaiming it on bad luck doesn’t help the purpose. As you ponder more, you get an idea. The idea is to blog about whatever you felt.
What results, is this post.
But as you come towards the end of the post you feel you might have digressed too much into the girl-boy topic. But anyways you expect people to understand. Every batch mate of yours feels the same way, only you decided to say it in words and publicly.
As you end the following line still rings in your brain : When you go/ Would you even turn to say/ “I don’t love you/ Like I did/ Yesterday”
You let the lines sink deep into you and you stop writing.